What is Conflict Coaching?
Conflict coaching is a process designed to assist an individual involved in a conflict with another individual or organization to bring resolution to that conflict without formally bringing a third party into the conflict.

How does it work?
In conflict coaching we work with just one party. We help you to see different ways of looking at the conflict or different potential options which you might apply in an attempt to resolve the conflict directly with the other party without resorting to outside intervention. There would be no reason for us to have contact of any kind with that other party. The other party never even needs to know that you are receiving advice from an outside resource if you don’t want them to.

How is that different than Mediation?
In mediation the “neutral” or mediator meets with both parties, initially together in most cases, and then separates the parties and works back and forth between the parties in what is often referred to as “shuttle diplomacy” fashion. With conflict coaching only the party who has retained the service will have contact with the problem resolution specialist. Rather than working to "mediate" the dispute in order to facilitate a mutually agreeable solution between the parties, the conflict coach takes on a party representation role in attempting to guide that party in their effort to negotiate a favorable settlement.

How effective is conflict coaching compared to Mediation or Arbitration?
Conflict coaching is not for everyone for a couple of reasons. First of all, conflict coaching may not be at all suitable for people who are so conflict averse that they cannot even talk to the other party about their differences; or when there is such a serious power imbalance that one party is afraid or intimidated by the other party.

Next, it is, generally speaking, a little more expensive since the problem resolution specialists fee is not being split between multiple parties. That being said it may still be more cost effective as a problem or conflict resolution method when you are dealing with a disputing party who may become increasingly defensive or confrontational if you attempt to bring in a “neutral” third party as you would for Mediation or Arbitration services.

If it’s likely to be more expensive and the problem resolution specialist is not even going to speak to the other party why would I want to use conflict coaching?
Conflict coaching provides many options and opportunities that are not likely to be had in any of the other forms of ADR. It assists in communication with a party who may be so defensive or angry (or both) that any hint of bringing in a “hired gun” (their perception) to solve the problem may be viewed as a threat. This may lead them to just go hire an attorney and file a lawsuit as a pre-emptive strike or take other action that would escalate the conflict rather than move it in a settlement direction.

Conflict coaching also helps you, as the party coached, to develop new skills or to refocus already well honed communications and negotiations skills. Such skills learned or sharpened in the crucible of conflict will serve most people well in all their future relationships whether business, family or others.